Is it okay to ask a Deaf person if they can talk?
When interacting with a Deaf person, it's important to be respectful and
considerate. Asking if they can talk is a delicate matter and should be
approached with sensitivity. Here are some points to consider:
1. Understand Communication Preferences: Many Deaf individuals use sign
language as their primary mode of communication. Some might use their voice, but
others may not be comfortable doing so. It's important to understand and respect
their preferred method of communication.
2. Be Polite and Respectful: If you feel it's necessary to ask, do so in a
polite and respectful manner. It's better to phrase your question in a way that
shows your willingness to communicate in whatever way is best for them, rather
than focusing on their ability to speak.
3. Use Alternative Communication Methods: Be prepared to use alternative
communication methods such as writing, typing on a phone, or using sign language
if you know it.
4. Avoid Assumptions: Avoid making assumptions about their abilities or
preferences. Each Deaf person is unique, with their own experiences and
preferences for communication.
5. Follow Their Lead: If the Deaf person initiates vocal communication,
you can follow their lead. However, if they prefer to sign or write, it's best
to respect that choice.
Remember, the key is to focus on effective communication and mutual
understanding, rather than on the method of communication itself.
Question:
I have a random question:) Do you ever speak with your voice or do you solely
sign? Like at home, do you ever use your voice for fun?
Answer:
Here's an example of me using my voice for fun:
Once in a while during my in-person classes a student will ask me, "Do you
speak?"
I sign to them (or type) that I can indeed speak and ask them, "Would you like
to hear me speak?"
They of course excitedly sign "Yes!"
At which point I make a show of it and sign "Ready?! Ready!? Listen carefully!
..."
The students lean forward in anticipation -- eyes wide with excitement in
anticipation of being let in on a secret.
I clear my throat for a moment, wet my lips a bit, and then let loose with a
couple of loud "Arf! Arf!" barking sounds as if I were a dog speaking on command
to appease my "master."
Yes indeed -- that is great fun!
Want more information on my "speaking abilities?"
For an insignificant little donation of $495.00 I'd be happy to email you a
report.
Donation link:
https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=64QMBRBXQSV6G
Thanks! Your contribution will help more people all over (including parents of
Deaf children) to learn sign language!
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Is it okay to ask a Deaf person if they can speak?
To answer that allow me to discuss for a moment the topic of "guns."
A gun is a powerful thing. While there are positive uses for a gun -- such as
security, protection, revolution from evil dictators, hunting for food, and
fending off zombies -- the fact is guns are dangerous (for example due to
accidental discharge, corrupting influence of power, and/or during times of
temporary emotional instability).
Guns can (and have been) used to harm, abuse, or oppress others. Regardless of
if you are for or against "guns" it is rather obvious that a gun gives the owner
an unfair advantage in a fight.
A stranger brandishing (or "waving around") a gun tends to be a source of
concern or fear to others. This fear or concern extends even to other gun owners
who often obtain a concealed carry permit so they can protect themselves from
some evil idiot who shows up in a mall and starts shooting people.
If you ask a person who is carrying a concealed gun to "whip it out" in public --
the person (if intelligent or at least sane) will likely tell you "no" because
to do so would likely cause an immediate public concern and possibly even panic
or an adverse reaction from those nearby. (For example someone else may tackle
or shoot the gun bearer.)
Let's state that again: Whipping out a gun in public tends to cause concern and
adverse (bad) reactions from those around you.
In the Deaf world you can to some extent compare the ability to speak to the act
of carrying of a gun.
The ability to speak is a form of "privilege" that some have and others do not.
The ability to speak can be (and has been) abused to unfairly gain jobs, favor,
or opportunities at the expense of individuals who do not speak.
Speaking can be (and has been) used to oppress and/or gain unfair advantage in a
"fight" for resources (promotions, discounts, dates, insider information,
camaraderie, attention and so forth).
A person "speaking" in the Deaf world causes concern in others who may (and
often do) choose attack the speaker in presumptive self-defense (via ostracism,
gossip, social media attacks, online petitions and so forth).
Asking a Deaf person in a public forum if they "speak" is somewhat like asking a
person to pull out a gun in public. You are asking us to do something
inappropriate in our culture. You are asking us to make a public declaration of
privilege and to expose ourselves to attack.
It is not your business and just because you are curious doesn't mean we need to
be telling you and causing concern to others while exposing ourselves to harm
via ostracism (exclusion from our society).
Many Deaf can and do voice (for a variety of reasons -- including some that are positive
and useful). The extent to which we can or cannot voice is typically not a secret to
our loved ones and close colleagues in the same way that the owning of a gun is
not a secret to the gun owner's loved ones and close colleagues.
If you have actually invested the time and effort to become close to or loved by a Deaf person
you will likely know the details about that person (whether we speak, carry a gun, or
cry at movies).
If you have not invested the time to become "close to" or "loved by" a
particular Deaf person then where, when, and if we choose to speak
is quite simply not (or not yet) your business.
Notes: